The Last Frontier

 

I have one place in  my life where I could be alone… about 70% of the time. The shower. 

I say 70% because some times Drew comes with me. And when it’s time for Hannah to be bathed I have Drew hand her to me at the end of my shower and hold her and bathe her. (She loves this)

Leah until a few days ago thought the shower was kind of scary.

But now?

She has decided that showering is Very. Very. Cool.

She’d like to take every shower with me.

She brings toys.

She giggles a lot.

I am not alone in the shower.

Now What?

The Question & A Note

Will I ever blog again on a regular basis?

Hopefully. I miss it! I think of things to blog about through out the day but by the time everyone is asleep and I can blog… *yawn* I want sleep!

I did want to make note of one thing today. I had this Facebook status:

…is watching Hannah try to roll herself from her back to her tummy. Is it wrong to hope it takes her a long time to figure it out???

Then barely two minutes later I posted this as a comment:

…Oh for the love of heaven. I put her on her tummy myself, she army crawled forward about 6 inches and she flipped over to her back! Never mind. LOL

I just didn’t want to forget to mark the date. She was 12 weeks old yesterday. She was 11 lbs when I weighed her with the Wii this morning. She’s so fantastic!

Oh IBS how I hate thee…

So I mentioned briefly on my blog that I finally admitted to  myself I had IBS but that it wasn’t a big deal. Just a few things I couldn’t eat anymore.

Alas, the longer I test out different foods, the longer the list gets of things that upset my system.

So, as I do, I decided this clearly required more research.

http://www.helpforibs.com/diet/trigger2.asp – this is a list of things I CANNOT eat. But in summary for you – anything too high in fat, red meat (including wild game which I have a freezer full of), pork, dark meat poultry & skin, egg yolks, dairy products (although I figured out I can have a little bit mixed in things – my tolerance is just low), chocolate, carbonation, artificial sweeteners (as a diabetic – WHAT A PAIN), and MSG (that crap is in everything). There are other things on that trigger list but since I don’t do coffee or caffeine or alcohol – those things were really easy to give up! haha.

Now fiber – this is the big juggle. There are two types of fiber. Insoluble and Soluble. We all need insoluble fiber. It’s what your body breaks down and uses as fiber, it keeps the pH balance in your GI system. But in an IBS person this stuff triggers attacks (which are just awful).

So what to do? This is a pretty good list of insoluble fibers - http://www.helpforibs.com/diet/fiber2.asp. This is a list of soluble ones  - http://www.helpforibs.com/diet/fiber1.asp. (If you look, notice how much incredibly short the soluble fiber list is. Not fair I think!)

So the deal is that if I have soluble fiber first then I can follow it with a little insoluble fiber and hopefully not suffer any consequences and still give my body the things it needs. For example, starting my meal with a salad – not good. But I can eat some rice and then have a small salad.

Oh add things high in sulfur (garlic, onions, some veggies, etc), anything highly acidic (too much citrus, vinegar, cooked tomatoes), and anything too high in fructose. – those are also things to be very careful with.

And all of this I have to balance with the fact that I have diabetes of course. If you look at the soluble fiber list you’ll see that many of those things are high in carbs – things that raise my blood sugar the most.

Add to that some things that are triggers for my acid reflux. Like citrus. I had about an inch of homemade lemonade awhile back – had acidic heartburn for 9 hours. And then IBS consequences for 48 hours. It was not awesome.

And then there is the endometriosis – which only effects me and rears it’s ugly head once a month but it is nonetheless wildly annoying. 

So I don’t want to be this person. This person with all the health issues. But apparently I don’t get a say.

I just want to get to the point where the IBS “diet” (I put that in quotes because it’s for the rest of my life of course) is second nature to me and I don’t have to think about it tons. Like my diabetes – just part of life.

The other day my sister asked me if I kept the receipt for this body. We had a whole hilarious conversation that followed. I love her!

Then my friend Kathy says to me on FB yesterday - your body isn't nearly as tough as your spirit!! (I was posting about my sunburn. Two hours total outside on a 70 something Wyoming May day and I look like a lobster! Ridiculous.)

And that I’d say is exactly what is at the root of my mental issues with this. I’m tough! I can take a lot – mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I have been through lots of things and come out the other side stronger each time. But my body? It’s not tough. Not at all. And it irritates me to no end!

Hannah – 2 months old!

The last couple of months is such a blur. I guess sleep deprivation does that to you… or it could be the fun!

Hannah is such a happy smiley person. It’s so fun when she first wakes up in the morning and gives me huge grins in greeting.

Let’s see…

• Hannah still hates to poop. However, it doesn’t normally involve crying anymore. She just concentrates and gets it done. She will make her displeasure known if you don’t get that poopy diaper off her quickly though!
• Something I forgot to mention last time (although I did talk about the lazy suck) – Hannah eats slow. Not a little bit slow. A LOT slow. She averages 5-7 minutes per ounce – which is an improvement over a month ago. So a 4 oz bottle (which she regularly does now – sometimes up to 6) takes about 45 minutes with the burping, etc. Each bottle is a time commitment so sometimes when she lets me know she’s hungry I’m running around going to the bathroom, make the bottle, get a drink. I feel kind of bad for the poor hungry baby but I know once I sit down I know I won’t be getting up. SHE doesn’t care if I need to pee. haha.
• We found a pacifier Hannah likes – which was ENTIRELY necessary. She sometimes would ask to eat and then get mad when food came out of the bottle. She just wanted to suck but she didn’t like any of the pacifiers we had. We were constantly making bottles and she would eat 1/4 of an ounce and fall asleep. So I went on the internet and found the ones Leah used to like. They’re the most similar to the bottles we have and when I offered her that one she was happily sucking away within a split second. Whew!
• She’s also recently figured out she could try to fight sleep. But I’ve got her number! She can’t stay awake if I sing to her. Sometimes she doesn’t make it through a whole song. Sometimes maybe 5. So we rock and sing and she falls asleep quickly. I love those moments. So so sweet!
• Hannah is full of grins. She smiles at lots of people if they try long enough but I get all her big grins. She did give one to Drew today. He got SO excited. It was adorable.
• She’s starting to sleep really well. One 4-5 hour stretch every night and last night she did an almost 7 hour stretch!

And now she needs me to go rock & sing to her. She won’t go to sleep for Daddy. If I think of more things to add I will come back in a little while.

Oh! And for those of you waiting for pictures on her picture blog. I’ll put more up tonight or tomorrow. I left my camera at  my mom’s last week with the card full of pictures. I have some from my cell phone from this week but I went and got my camera back yesterday. Whew! I’m no good at being without my camera!

ETA – She’s about 10 lbs now but I don’t know exactly. I only know that from the weigh myself holding her method.

A Constellation

The other day I was doing a worksheet with Leah. (practicing 10, 20, 30, etc). It was a dot-to-dot thing. There were stars all over it and then the dot-to-dot made a star. 

After she’s done I say, “Cool! What did you make?”

“A constellation.”

She’s supposed to say star but technically there are several stars on that page so I didn’t correct her.

Haha.

Happy Mother’s Day

My Mother’s Hands

By Lorie Barton

I’m thankful for my mother’s hands, which help me every day.

With her hands she shows me how to work and how to play.

It seems that when I need some help, her hands are always there

To tie my shoes, or make me lunch, or comb my messy hair.

Her hands know how to fix my bike and how to make my bed,

And how to find a scripture verse to ease my worried head.

 

I want my hands, like Mother’s, to serve others every day.

I want my hands to know, like hers, how to work and play.

I know that when she needs some help, my hands can help her too.

Because she’s taught me well, they know exactly what to do.

I’ll thank my mother for her hands and hug her really tight.

And promise her to use my hands to always do what’s right.

LDS.org - Friend Article - My Mother’s Hands

****

I was reading this magazine with Leah yesterday, just going from page to page reading things to her and we got to this poem and it choked me up (of course) and when we got to the last line Leah pulled my hands to her chest and hugged them. So adorable.

 

Happy Mother’s Day! Most especially to my own Momma. Love you!

about Hannah…

…who is one month old today!

I’ve been thinking about how to formulate this post and have it make any sense – or least be more story like but I give up making it work out. Here you will now get a bulleted list of things about Hannah!

• Hannah is an eating machine. On average babies eat about 2.5 oz per day for every lb they weigh. Hannah exceeds that everyday. Sometimes by a little, sometimes by quite a lot. (She is, as I’m typing this, starting to stir next to me. It’s been roughly an hour and a half since she ate. I bet she wants more already). Sometimes we have 12 feedings in a day. Sometimes less. It’s impossible to guess how much she will eat from bottle to bottle. Sometimes 1 oz because she wanted a snack, sometimes 4. Even 5 once. I’m just saying – she likes to eat. Which leads me to…
• Food coma – after she eats a large amount she’s like a floppy noodle. When she’s hungry she can hold her head up, look around, move her body about but when she’s full? It’s like she loses all ability and goes completely limp. It’s hysterical.
• She has gained about 2.5 lbs since we left the hospital – in her first month of life. She was 6 lb 10 oz at birth, 6 lb 3 oz when we left the hospital, 7 lb 11 oz at her 2 week appt. And doing the ‘weigh myself holding her, weigh myself without her' thing – she’s just over 9 lbs now. Amazing!
• Hannah hates to poop. And I don’t mean she kind of dislikes it – She LOATHES pooping. She has at least currently reached the point where she doesn’t cry her eyes out every time she poops. I have to put her in “poop position” (as I have come to call it. Catchy, right? I’m clever. I know.) and she will concentrate and get it done without crying. If she needs to poop and I haven’t noticed it yet she will cry until I put her in that position and immediately stop. I keep telling her – You aren’t gonna out grow this pooping thing so you might as well get used it. People poop. It’s part of life – but she doesn’t really listen to me. ;)
• She makes tons of faces. I have posted picture proof on her picture blog. She can furrow her brow like no ones business.
• Hannah is very easy to put to sleep and once she is asleep I can set her down anywhere comfy and she will keep sleeping. (This is a new experience for me. Leah would only sleep if I was holding her or laying down with her & holding her. I couldn’t do anything) This is fantastic for me. So I can get things done in little bursts between the feedings. This isn’t to say I don’t hold her through many naps because – well – I love holding a sleeping baby. It’s just nice that I CAN set her down when I need to clean or cook dinner or play with Leah or whatever.
  • I should interject here that Drew disagrees with this. She’s easy for *me* to put to sleep. It takes her longer and she’s way more fidgety if anyone else is doing it.
• If she’s hungry and you kiss her on the lips she will open and close her mouth and kiss back. Okay really she’s trying to latch on because she’s hungry but it’s adorable. And I do it every chance I get.
• She has gas troubles. She’s on formula to reduce gas, bottles to reduce gas, gas drops with each bottle – and still the child has gas. Not as bad as if you forget the drops but still gas. I just have to keep her legs bent and it passes fairly quickly but as with pooping – she does not like it. And of course gas pains hurt so who can blame her.
• Hannah has the worst latch. It’s called a lazy suck I learned. Even at the hospital I feed her the first few times and the nurse feed her once while we were out getting something to eat and when we got back she asks me “How did you even get her to take that much!” (meaning about .5 oz) and went on to talk about how lazy her suck reflex was. She’s done much better since we left the hospital and are using wider/larger bottle nipples. But this contributes to the gas of course. And to the fact that when she drinks a 4 oz bottle we have to stop 2-3 times to burp her during it. You can tell when it’s time to burp because she gets all squirmy.
• Burping – she’s the best burper ever! Sometimes all you have to do is sit her up and she burps but it never takes more than a minute or so. And normally much less.
• Her gag reflex however is superb. She can’t use the soothie pacifiers they use at the hospitals because it’s too long and makes her gag every time. Poor kid. She will also gag simply from having to much spit gather in her mouth. She has to sleep at an angle. If she’s flat on her back she will gag in her sleep – and wake up of course.
• I’m forgetting things to add. Maybe I’ll come back later if I think of more. Not that this isn’t already an insanely long-winded list…
• ETA (the next day - I knew there would be something!) - Hannah LOVES being in the water - as long as I'm holding her & with her. Whether it's sitting in the bathtub or taking a shower. It makes her all calm and happy. She only cries when she realizes it's over. So fun!
  

Now one more thing I want to address. I’ve had a few quiet questions about Hannah’s race. So I’m gonna share about it here but first let me share my reasoning with you for doing this.

I understand, of course, that race is a sensitive issue and that people are worried about asking it because it’s not “PC” and no one wants to offend. But if *I* don’t talk about it and show my genuine delight and excitement about the mixture that is Hannah, how will she know? How will she know to be proud of all of the parts that make up who she is? If we’re quiet about it will she think it’s something to be ashamed of? Because that’s a horrifying thought to me!

So – Hannah is 1/4 African American, 1/4 Italian, 1/8 Vietnamese, and 3/8 Caucasian.

Her coloring seems to be changing every day. Her eye color definitely has changed several times. She even had a stretch where she had 3 rings of color in her eyes at once. They seem to be blending now. I find the genetics fascinating. And it’s like we get to watch the interplay of these things work themselves out inside her body. Bi or Multi-racial children can take several months to gain whatever color they may be in the long run. Leah only took about a month – and still her color is different depending on the season.

Anyway! We are having a fantastic time here. Hannah is a joy and has fit quite well into life.

Leah is absolutely loving having a baby sister but that’s another (probably long winded) post that will have to wait for another time. I have to go show Leah how to tie dye now. She’s REALLY excited! (She got a kit from Aunt Leah for Christmas and we just aquired white t-shirts this weekend – thanks to Nana for stopping at Walmart!)

He’s funny

 

*Drew makes some rather bad joke*

Me: *fake laugh* ha ha ha.

Drew: You know I love that fake laugh.

Me: Oh ya?

Drew: Ya. It makes me feel all fake warm inside.

Me: *real laugh*

Baby Bag

I couple of weeks before Hannah was born I saw this pattern at Wal-Mart and I found this fabric – and I just had to have it!

 

 

 

 

 

 

I read the list on the back. I had to buy a zipper. What? A Zipper? I’d never done that before. But it was way easier than I expected and it turned out great! Actually the only piece of clothing I had ever made was a man nightgown/caftan thing out of candy bar fabric once. It was hysterical and I never finished all the hems and stuff because Drew wouldn’t give it back to me. He loved it. Crazy man. This turned out better!

 

It has come in very hand with it being so cold the last few days and she looks adorable in it!

(There are pictures of her in it I’m sure you’d love to see but I’m too tired to get up off the couch! LOL)

Picture Blogs

I don't remember if I've ever posted about Leah's picture blog but now I have one for Hannah too.

They are both set to private so if you'd like to see them you just need to give me an email and I'll send you an invite.

I'm not super secretive truly. It's just a "there are creepy people in the world" thing.

Leah's I have not updated since December (I'm lame obviously). Hannah's has some pictures on it already. I updated it yesterday.

:)