Simple Woman

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FOR TODAY... 3 Nov 2013

Outside my window... It's dark & cold. Brr.

I am thinking... how nasty and NOT Christ-like some Christians can be. It's appalling.

I am thankful... for the people who love me for who I am

In the kitchen... there's a mess. I wish there was cake.

I am wearing... a nightgown.

I am creating... a (hopefully) peaceful religious path for my children.

I am going... to sleep soon.

I am wondering... why I have to have so many food issues. Again, I just want some cake.

I am reading... Clockwork Prince (It's the 2nd in a series) & Rough Stone Rolling.

I am hoping... that some of my husband's family can put their dislike of me aside and come support my daughter at her baptism. I'm not holding my breath though.

I am looking forward to... celebrating Leah's 8th birthday & my 16th wedding anniversary. After that there is Thanksgiving and my Mom's birthday! I love this season. So much family & so much love!

I am learning... to let go of people that don't add happy things to my life. All relationships are a mixed bag. Even the good ones! But the ones that add no good? Letting go... Radical Self-Respect!

Around the house... There's a load of clothes in the washer. I've washed them 3 times now - Not counting the first time when they went through the dryer with two big fat crayons. It's never coming out. I can't stand to loose that many clothes at once. It makes me feel loopy.

I am pondering... if I should go to bed early. Hannah is sick and I'm afraid I'm getting it.

A favorite quote for today... “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . ."”   ― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

One of my favorite things... random unexpected affection.

A few plans for the rest of the week: Leah only has school for 2.5 this week. (Parent Teacher Conferences). Hannah doesn't have any because there is voting in her school on Tuesday and then Conferences for her too. I haven't told Hannah she has no school. So I have to come up with some stuff to keep these kids entertained this week. Oy.

A peek into my day... This is actually yesterday. Hannah didn't feel well and was hanging out in our bed. She's on the right there. I just joined instagram so I was trying to find something to take a picture of. lol. I put #busysaturday as the tag. It was a peaceful day.

Gluten-Free, Corn-Free Crusty French Bread Rolls

I posted this picture on Facebook today because I was eating this roll and thought I might cry in happiness:


The recipe I used came from this book:


You can click on the book and it will take you to amazon.com to purchase it. Or you can look inside of it there too. I have made several recipes from it now and I feel like I can now highly recommend this book as a whole! There is a recipe in the back for CHEESE NIPS & for GRAHAM CRACKERS. I’m really really excited to make those at some point. There are many other things I’m excited to try too but I’ve never found corn free/wheat free cheese crackers or graham crackers.


For the friends who asked for the recipe (I’m sure this is some kind of copyright infringement lol)…

In the book she has several flour mixes and each of the recipes are based off one of the mixes. These rolls are from the “French Bread/Pizza Mix”.

The following makes 6 cups of the mix. 

• 3½ cups White Rice Flour (I was running low on white rice flour and had about 2 cups. The other 1½ was brown rice flour.)
• 2½ cups Tapioca Flour
• 2 TB Xanthan Gum
• 2 (1 oz/7 grams) packets Unflavored Gelatin
• 2 TB Egg Replacer (This link is to the egg replacer I use. There are others. Bob’s Red Mill has one. I’ve seen a few)
• ¼ cup Sugar (white)

Just put that all in a baggie (or whatever). Mix it up. Label  it. You can also double it. The 2 TB of xanthan gum & egg replacer doubles to ¼ cup.

Crusty French Rolls - 6 Rolls (In the parentheses – The second number is the amount if you want to double the recipe – not everything actually doubles)

Dry Ingredients

• 1¾ (3½) cups French Bread/Pizza Mix
• 1 (1) TB Yeast Granules
• 3 (6) TB Dry Milk Powder or Nondairy Substitute (There’s a brand called “Better Than Milk” that comes in soy, rice, etc – I haven’t tried it but I keep meaning to. Dairy free would be nice too)
• ½ (1) tsp salt
• ½ (1) tsp baking powder (make sure it’s corn free!) 
  
• FYI: substitute for 1 tsp baking powder (in case you can’t find a corn free baking powder):
• ¼ tsp baking soda
• ½ tsp cream of tartar
• ¼ tsp starch – arrowroot, potato starch (not potato flour), tapioca starch

Wet Ingredients

• 2 (4) Egg Whites
• 1 (2) tsp Dough Enhancer or Vinegar (I use vinegar)
• 1½ (3) TB Vegetable Oil
• ⅔ (1⅓) cups warm water (more or less this amount. I had to add some more to get the texture she described)

Grease 1(2) cookie sheet(s) with vegetable oil spray. Dust with fine cornmeal. (I used millet flour.) 

In the bowl of a heavy-duty mixer, combine the dry ingredients. Blend gently with the mixer on low. In a bowl, whisk together the egg whites, dough enhancer/vinegar and vegetable oil. Add most of the warm water.

Add the liquids to the dry ingredients and blend. If the dough is too thick, add more water until the dough seems thick enough that it will spoon out into a roll shape. Turn the mixer to high and beat for 2½ minutes.

Spoon onto the prepared cookie sheets and form into French roll shape. Cover lightly and let rise in a warm place until double in size (about 35 minutes for rapid rise yeast, 60 or more minutes for regular yeast). Bake in a preheated 425 degree oven for 20-22 minutes.

Stuff face.

Okay. It doesn’t say that last bit exactly…

I’ve typed this up but seriously – buy the book. It’s worth it. You can make pizza crust (obviously), pita bread, bagels, pretzel sticks… Plus there are 4 other flour blends and many more recipes. /*end sales pitch. You’d think I got something for it. lol

Oh one more thing – I made 8 rolls out of the 6 roll recipe. I know it was supposed to be 6 but I was too lazy to repair the situation. lol.

I brushed them with butter because I’m a brilliant bad person.

DELICIOUS. I think I’ll go have another now…

National Pregnancy & Infant Loss Rememberance Day

In honor of this day I wanted to write a post. The problem is - I've done it.  So I decided I'm just going to repost.

This initial post gives it more context though: Miscarriages.







25 Oct 2011
Post: Balloons

This is a place Drew says he used to come to sometimes as a teenager when he wanted to be alone and sit by the river. It’s about 15 miles outside of town.

Yes, Wyoming already looks like winter. I know you were thinking that… In fact it was pouring rain as we left town and got on the interstate and just as we pulled up to the river it stopped raining. Just a stray rain drop now and then.



This is what 60 balloons looks like in a bunch (that’s a rain drop on the picture).






My friend at the store that did the balloons (she’s the floral department manager) put in one “It’s a Girl” balloon and one “It’s a Boy” balloon. I was surprised how right that felt. It was a great idea.



I took the balloons from Drew and held them all at once. He put his arms around me and said a prayer. Then I pulled the balloons more down around me. For just a minute they were all around me and I stood there and cried. Then I started letting them go one at a time.





Just as we got back in the car and started to drive away again, it started pouring. It felt like an acknowledgement from Heavenly Father of what we were doing there. It was very sweet.

I’m amazed at how much better I feel having done that. Lighter some how.

I ordered the fabric to make the quilt right before we left. I have a poem that’s going to go on the back of it in the corner. I found this image of it the other day…

A Life Uncommon

It was a rough weekend emotionally. I'm a little raw from it.

So I'm driving along. Taking my girls to the library (we seriously have the best library ever. We stayed for three hours!). And I turn on the CD in my car. It's a Jewel CD that I have had FOREVER. I know every word to every song. And yet somehow this song was all new to me today. So I'm singing along and just started to cry as I drive (almost ran a red light too).

It's perfect. It spoke to my soul today - which sounds totes dramatic but it really did.




Lyrics

Don’t worry mother
It’ll be alright
And don’t worry sister
Say your prayers and sleep tight
And it’ll be fine
Lover of mine
It’ll be just fine

And lend your voices only
To sounds of freedom
No longer lend your strength
To that which you wish
To be free from
Fill your lives
With love and bravery
And you shall lead
A life uncommon

I’ve heard your anguish
I’ve heard your hearts cry out
We are tired, we are weary
But we aren’t worn out
Set down your chains
Until only faith remains
Set down your chains

And lend your voices only
To sounds of freedom
No longer lend your strength
To that which you wish
To be free from
Fill your lives
With love and bravery
And we shall lead
A life uncommon

There are plenty of people
Who pray for peace
But if praying were enough
It would’ve come to be
Let your words enslave no one
And the heavens will hush themselves
To hear our voices ring our clear
With sounds of freedom
Sounds of freedom

Come on you unbelievers
Move out of the way
There is a new army coming
And we are armed with faith
To live, we must give
To live

And lend our voices only
To sounds of freedom
No longer lend our strength
To that which we wish
To be free from
Fill your lives
With love and bravery
And we shall lead...

And lend our voices only
To sounds of freedom
No longer lend our strength
To that which we wish
To be free from
Fill your lives
With love and bravery
And we shall lead
A life uncommon 

***
I started to bold the parts that spoke to me but it was almost all bold so I gave up.

So my fellow MoFems especially - we've had a hard weekend. I hope this soothes your soul in the same way it soothed my own. My love to you!

What I think...

If you're not interested in Mormon politics and religious establishment inner workings... you might want to skip this post. lol

What I think about Ordain Women:

I'd actually really love to eloquently tell you what I think but I'm still studying. I didn't become aware of this movement soon enough to have fallen firmly on one side or the other. I am doing my duty and diligently studying the issue.

I believe as LDS people this is, in fact, our duty. We are supposed to study issues, learn what we can, study it out in our minds, and THEN pray about it.

I have gotten this far - I absolutely - without doubt - support their right to do what they are currently doing. If you study church history there are many examples of change within the church coming "from the bottom up". In fact, all through all kinds of history, change nearly always comes from the bottom.That's fairly common knowledge.

What I cannot understand is the nasty vehemence that is literally being spewed at this group and at anyone who supports them. I am truly baffled by this. Do these people belong to the same church I do??? I just can't wrap my mind around telling someone to "just deal with it" or "why don't you just leave the church?" Leave the church? Really?

So. In a gospel where we preach that we are brothers and sisters, that we are all children of God, that our singular purpose is to make our way back to our Father in Heaven, to help each other on that path and live together forever.... an acceptable reaction is "just leave the church?"

To me the idea is to study and to learn where people are coming from. If you love someone and you believe in this gospel - you meet them where they are. You find a way to bridge the gap between you. You do NOT eject them. You do NOT reject that.

Ugh. I have to stop talking about that part. I'm getting so mad.

I will tell you some things I absolutely believe - Our church needs to make some changes. Women have more purpose than to make babies (aka more members of the church) and bring each other bread. We have more purpose than the roles we are given right now.

Here is a post my sister wrote for Rational Faiths: If the Sisters Should Have Faith to Heal... I love it because she references quotes and factual information. And those things absolutely back up the following change list.

I like the changes suggested here:

• Encourage partnership in marriage and eliminate the idea that husbands preside over their wives.
  
  
• Create parity in the Young Women and Young Men organizations through equivalent budgets, educational programs (leadership, career, and spiritual training,) and activities (sports, service, and outdoor events).
  
  
• Balance the stories and images of boys and men in church publications, talks, and other media with stories and images of girls and women.
  
  
• Invite women in Church leadership positions to speak and pray during General Conference in numbers equal to the participation of men.
  
  
• Encourage leaders to use gender-inclusive language whenever possible.
  
  
• Recognize that girls and boys, women and men are equally responsible for appropriate sexual behavior, and avoid reducing morality to sexuality, and modesty to a preoccupation with women’s and girls’ clothing.
  
  
• Instruct bishops to refrain from asking Church members probing questions about sexual practices and experiences.
  
  
• Call women to perform pastoral counseling, particularly for women and girls who have been sexually abused.
  
  
• Choose a General Relief Society Presidency and General Board that reflect the diversity of viewpoint and circumstance in the Church, and establish frequent meetings between the First Presidency and the General Relief Society Presidency.
  
  
• Include the Stake Relief Society President in Stake Presidency meetings, and appoint women to meet with the High Council.
  
  
• Delegate more expansive supervisory authority to the Stake and Ward Relief Society, Young Women, and Primary presidencies, including approval of personnel, programs, and activities.
  
  
• Include women among stake and ward leaders who hear evidence and offer judgment in Church disciplinary councils.
  
  
• Include the local Relief Society president in all bishopric meetings, and rotate the planning of Sacrament services among the Relief Society president and members of the bishopric.
  
  
• Examine all Church positions to determine whether they can be filled without regard to gender.
  
  
• Appoint women as presidents of Church universities and heads of administrative departments.
  
  
• Expand hiring practices in the Seminaries and Institutes of Religion and within the religion departments at Church universities to provide women the same placement, advancement, and tenure opportunities as men.
  
  
• Call young women as well as young men to serve missions at the same age and for the same length of time, and afford women the same opportunity as men to function as district leaders, zone leaders, and assistants to the president.
  
  
• Lift the prohibition on women's participation in the blessing of their children.
  
  
• Change temple marriage policies so that men and women have equal opportunity to be sealed to their second spouses after they are widowed or divorced.
  
  
• Consider further wording changes to temple ceremonies and ordinances such that both men and women make the same covenants and enjoy the same promises.
  
  
• Recognize women as witnesses for baptisms and marriage sealings.
  
  
• Restore the former institutionally-accepted practice of women giving blessings of healing and comfort.

So there. I stand behind that list. And I stand behind my sisters who are trying to make the changes - peacefully, correctly, kindly trying to make the changes. They are brave and amazing. Especially in the face of so much unkindness. My thoughts and prayers will be with them as they travel to SLC (from near and from across the ocean!) to stand peacefully outside of the priesthood session. I will be watching. I will be praying. I wish I could be there to lend my support in person!

I also really love this post: I Am My Sister's Keeper. I say amen to that post. I *am* my Sister's Keeper and they are my sisters.

And my prayer will include this post: Listen. Please please Listen.

October!

I feel a sense of excitement at the beginning of October. From this point forward the year seems to go by so fast! Football season is in full swing. Kids are in school. Life is churning along (unless you work for the government today. That's another story...).

And the planning is beginning. I love and dread that part. I have Birthday List (Leah) going and Christmas Lists - stockings and presents. The girls and I already went shopping and got all their Halloween costume stuff. They're such fun little girls.

Although they wanted to choose things from Monster High and I had to put the smack down on that. Ugly and expensive? No.

I just remembered I forgot to check on my fantasy football team this week. Crap. What if I had Bye Week players on? Oops. *Update - I checked my team. Sure enough there was a bye week player. In comforting news it wouldn't have won me the match to have switched with my benched player. I lost by 6 points. If I'd switched I would have lost by 2.5 points. Lame. Ready for next week now though!

Anyway - as we were. Yay fall! Bring on the (gluten free, corn free, peanut free) pumpkin treats! Bring on the Halloween to celebrate our love of candy (I'm such a good diabetic!). Bring on the food abundance of Thanksgiving! Bring on the love and joy and fun and family of it all! And then bring on Christmas! The fun joy and excitement of Christmas. I love getting to be at my mom's house for Christmas break. The relaxed feeling of getting to be with people who get me & know me. Wonderful stuff.

However - feel free to mourn with me about the fact that we have a chance of snow on Friday. Wyoming - Yay? Leah is really excited though. And watching her excitement  about anything is always fun.

Fall in Wyoming:

I put "Fall in Wyoming" into google images. This was a result. That's the truth right there.

Do you love Fall? What are your favorite parts?

Make it stop

This isn't happening

Just NO.

I bought tiny bras today. Definitely not for me. For another girl who lives in my house.

Save me.

Cat Love Problems

This weekend I was in Pet Smart. In these stores my children suddenly believe we are in a zoo and we must walk the store looking for every animal there is to see.

I save the corner with the cats for last. Always.

Why?

Well, I love cats - really really really love - and I'm always hopeful I can rush the children through the last bit and we won't dwell on the cats.

If we dwell... I love. And it's very hard for me to walk away.

So we've made our way around to the cats. I remind the girls not to tap on the glass and immediately the cat in front of me starts rubbing against the glass trying to get me to pet him. Pet Smart doesn't have any way for you to actually touch the cats without asking (Petco does - just FYI) so I couldn't pet him. I start reading his information. Sigh.

He was FREE. WTH! I start looking around. There are 4 adults cats. They are all black or black and a few patches of white. All adults. FREE.

Black cats are the hardest to find homes for because people believe some archaic superstitions about the blackness of cats. Stupidity.

So they're doing a little marketing. Reminding people that black cats are not scary or a curse and giving them away.

So I stood there looking at these cats. Seeing the markdowns. $10.00 was crossed out and FREE written over it. And I started to cry.

I'm such a baby. Cry. Cry. Cry.

No one would adopt them at $10.00!?!? Kick  me in the gut.

If my children were not both allergic to cats, I would have left with two cats. Without doubt.

I love my dogs, I really do. But I am definitely a cat person.

A cat person with cat-allergic children. Oh the irony.

If you have a home for a cat, go get one. Go in any shelter (or your local Pet Smart and see if they are giving them away for free too!) specifically request a black cat. They'll be pleased and you'll have my undying gratitude. 

UC Berkley Study: Black cats have bad luck getting adopted

The Spirit of God Dwells Here

I was thinking earlier about all the elitism I hear at church, out in the world, among all religions, etc. It always makes me ragey and sad. It shouldn't be done. This scripture has come to me over and over again:

Matthew 18:20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

Oddly that doesn't seem to mention a specific religion. It doesn't say two or three Mormons. It doesn't say two or three Baptists. Catholics, Methodists, Born Agains, etc. Heck it doesn't even say which name. Heavenly Father, God, Jesus, Eloheim, Allah, El Shaddai, Yahweh, Adonai, Jehovah... (that's all I have off the top of my head lol)

My idea? Stop assuming your religion has the corner on having God pay attention to them.

That is all. 

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/nakedpastor/

Picture Day

Is it okay for me to say I hate picture day?

It's expensive and the pictures are never as good as I wish because Leah is s shy with new people.

But if I don't get them Leah is sad because she feels left out. I can't stand that. So I spend the money and get the photos of my shy child. 

And... I'm going to visit my mom today and Leah won't let us leave early. Stupid picture day :p

PS Drew took that picture with his phone. Then I messed with it in an editor. Still cuter than  her school pictures usually are.

Taking back my blog!

Dear People of the World*,

There are actually reasons why my blog died. When previously asked I blamed it on Hannah. She was a baby, blah blah blah. But I blogged all through Leah's babyhood...

So here's what really happened:

My husband's family - specifically my FIL - said some rude things to Drew about my blog. I was really really hurt. He told my husband that "everyone" had discussed it and they all didn't like my blog. Who is everyone? He wouldn't say.

My heart was broken. I couldn't believe people who had been my family for so many years, didn't comment on my blog ever (so I assumed they didn't read it) could be discussing my blog and all it's negative qualities as a clan? I cried. My husband comforted me. But in his family they don't discuss these things to your face. So it was over from that point. Drew did bring it up and try to find out who but his Dad wouldn't tell him anything. So I was just left to assume it was everyone. 

From that point on I posted nothing of any depth. Pictures. Mostly about food. A surface post every now and then.

Later a commenter on my blog complained that I was only posting about food.

Done. That's it. I couldn't take any more at that time. There was too much on my plate.

But why? Why did I hand over and retreat from my little section of the internet because there are unkind people connected to me?

I refuse to continue with this. 

So here are my new rules:

You don't like me? Don't read my blog.
You don't like what I post about? Don't read my blog.
You don't like me and you're using it for fodder in your conversations about me? I DO NOT CARE.

I've been trying for 16 years to be reserved enough for this extended family but it won't ever be enough. Because guess what? I'm NOT. There's nothing mild about me. I have opinions. About EVERYTHING.

Even at that - I love to discuss them. I'll listen to what you have to say. Heck I might even change my mind! As long as you're discussing it like an adult there is absolutely a chance I haven't heard information you're offering. I might push back. I might ask questions but I'll listen too.

So there you have it. When I think of topics to blog about - I will come blog about them.

I'm in the middle of a "faith crisis" as it is called. I'm researching church (LDS/Mormon) history and I'm shocked and appalled at some of the things I'm finding. Things that aren't taught in our Sunday School Manuals at church.

I have been fairly open about it and now my husband's family is mad at me for that too. There is a movement right now called Ordain Women. Because I have been studying old history I've learned that women used to give blessings, some women were even ordained. There were Prophetess and Priestesshood. Where did it all go? I don't have any idea. So I see why these women have organized. They are asking the church to discuss it. They're peaceful, using proper channels for each thing, etc.

They're being portrayed as picket sign holding crazies. It's infuriating. Read people. READ. Find out the truth instead of using some random blog post as proof of the issues. Go to Ordain Women. Read the purpose and then judge for yourself. If you disagree, disagree! But don't lie. Don't say they're out holding picket signs. Don't portray them as awful church members or apostates. It isn't TRUE.

At any rate, I voiced my disagreement on facebook and a SIL decided to hide all her information from me, do a status and talk about how her children needed protected from "some people". I could quote it for you here but that's a bit of an invasion of privacy. Why do I know? She didn't hide it from MY HUSBAND or even all our other mutual friends. Seriously? Fail. Unless the point was to make sure I knew but also hurt me? I have no idea.

And I don't care. I wasn't rude in my disagreeing. I stated factual information. But now I'm a danger to children.

Awesome.

For me this is the final straw. I'm done attending family events. I'm done trying to be a part of something that doesn't want me. If  you can't love me for who I am... *shrug* Why should I shrink who I am to fit into something? I don't want to and I'm tired of feeling shamed for who I am.

Heavenly Father made me too. And I think I'm glorious. Am I perfect? No. Have I done things they haven't liked? I'm sure I have but since we don't talk about things in that family. I have no clue what they are. Have I made mistakes? You betcha. Maybe this blog post is even one of them.

But at this moment I don't care. I'm done with this. If you don't like me - go away. I got enough to deal with on a day-to-day basis. I have fibromyalgia pretty badly these days. Some days it's hard to just manage myself and my girls and Drew - and let's be real, sometimes all I manage is making sure the girls don't go to bed hungry. I don't have room for struggling with people who want me to be someone else.

And making this choice? I feel SO MUCH LIGHTER. It's like lifting a weight off of me. And that is priceless.

This is my blog. The End.

*That's dramatic right? And a bit grandiose. Heh. It's been so long are there even 3 people still checking my blog??

Gluten Free Pudding Brownies

These brownies are dairy-free, wheat-free, soy-free, corn-free, low-fat, egg-free, high in fiber & protein... I'm sure there is more but that should do.

They are an adaption of these: IBS Brownies - which were not wheat free. I've had IBS longer than I've been gluten free. I used to eat those brownies and just love them but it's been a long time. I decided it was time to have them again!

These are rich and decadent. You will not eat them and feel as if you are missing anything at all!

Ingredients
1 cup sugar, divided
1/4 cup garfava flour
2 TB sorghum flour
1/4 cup + 2 tbsp arrowroot starch*
1/4 cup + 2 tbsp tapioca starch/flour
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder, divided
2 tsp baking powder**
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/4 cup oil (I used a mix of olive and canola I had on hand)
1/2 cup unsweetened almond milk***
1 tbsp ground cacao powder**** (optional)
1 tsp vanilla
1 cup boiling water

Directions
Preheat over to 350F. Spray an 8-inch or 9-inch pan with cooking spray.

Whisk together the dry batter ingredients (2/3 cup sugar, the flours, salt, 1/4 cup cocoa, baking powder, and cinnamon) until blended thoroughly. Add the oil, almond milk, and vanilla. Stir until you form a stiff batter. Spoon the batter evenly into the pan you have prepared.

In a small bowl combine remaining 1/3 cup sugar and 1/4 cocoa. Whisk together. Sprinkle on top of batter in an even layer.

Dissolve cacao powder into the boiling water. Pour over the batter. DO NOT STIR.

Bake for 25 to 30 minutes, until the top is brownie crackled and crisp. Serve Warm! When you cut the brownies, take the piece and flip it upside down onto a plate. Instantly your brownie has a warm chocolate-y sauce. Delicious.



 Enjoy!


*If you are not concerned about being corn-free you could absolutely use corn starch here. 

**If you ARE concerned about it being corn free, make sure your baking powder doesn't contain corn starch. If you don't have that or are unable to find it you can use this substitution: 1/2 tsp cream of tarter, 1/4 tsp baking soda, 1/4 tsp arrowroot or tapioca.

***If you would like for these to be tree nut-free just use rice milk! It works just as well in this recipe. I even had one friend make them for me when I was sick years ago. She didn't have rice milk and tried them with just water. They were still delicious. Perhaps slightly less rich.  

****You could use instant coffee. Decaffeinated would be best as the original recipe calls for. I do not drink coffee so I used the delicious cacao powder. Either way it is optional.

Random Meme

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?

I can't remember ever looking in the mirror. I did take a bath but I just put my hair in a pony tail after.

2. How much cash do you have on you?

Some change. I never have any cash.

3. What’s a word that rhymes with DOOR?

Core

4. Favorite planet?

Saturn. I wish we could look up in the sky and see those rings around our planet. Wouldn't that make for a cool night sky??

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?

Drew

6. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?

My Wish by Rascal Flats

7. What shirt are you wearing?

I have on jammies.

8. Do you label yourself?

Nope. 

9. Name the brand of the shoes you’re currently wearing?

No shoes

10. Bright or Dark Room?

Currently it's dark. I'm watching a movie while I type. I like dark better though.

11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?

I have no idea who it is. I just googled to find a meme to do because I get bored if I'm not multitasking.

12. What does your watch look like?

What watch? I look at my phone when I want to know the time.

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?

Sleeping probably. I went to bed around then.

14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?

"Totally Creepy!"

15. Where is your nearest 7-11?

I have no idea. All the 7-11s turned to Kum N Go in Wyoming years and years ago. There is one just a few blocks from here.

16. What's a word that you say a lot?

What is wrong with you people??

17. Who told you he/she loved you last?

Leah & Hannah at the same time when they said good night to me.

18. Last furry thing you touched?

Peaches, my dog.

19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days?

LOL that's funny. Celebrex, Claritin, Glyburide... other stuff. Crazy things like that.

20. How many rolls of film do you need developed?

Film? Seriously? It's been a long time.

21. Favorite age you have been so far?

Just before I turned 30 - five weeks before - I became a mother for the first time. 30 was definitely a glorious year.

22. Your worst enemy?

Myself

23. What is your current desktop picture?

A Japanese Maple in bloom. It's gorgeous.

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?

Good night Children.

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?

That's a tough one but as my being able to fly would give me children nothing... I guess I'll go for the million bucks.

26. Do you like someone?

Yes.

27. The last song you listened to?

Be Still by The Fray

28. What time of day were you born?

10:30ish in the morning

29. What’s your favorite number?

No favorite. I like them all equally. Well... hmm. that's not true. I like pi and e the most. Not much cooler than the natural numbers. e I guess. That's the best one. It does so many things!

30. Where did you live in 1987?

Claremore, Oklahoma

31. Are you jealous of anyone?

No one in particular. I'd like to be rolling in money though. That'd be nice.

32. Is anyone jealous of you?

That's funny. Maybe? My children are kind of awesome. haha. But I doubt it.

33. Where were you when 9/11 happened?

I was just getting up for the morning. I went to check the weather to decide what to wear to school that day. The weather channel was playing footage of the first plane crash and I watched as the second one happened.

34. What do you do when vending machines steal your money?

Kick. Hit.

35. Do you consider yourself kind?

Yes.

36. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?

On my hip. Maybe my ribs. Something with white ink.

37. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?

Spanish. My husband speaks Spanish and it would be lovely to be able to talk to him.

38. Would you move for the person you loved?

Yes. and I have.

39. Are you touchy feely?

Yes.

40. What’s your life motto?

Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow." -Mary Ann Radmacher

41. Name three things that you have on you at all times?

I'm stymied. Clothes? That's all I can come up with.

42. What’s your favourite town/city?

That's hard! I love lots of places. Really it could be any city with good sushi, my children, and some family.

43. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?

I can't even think of the last time I paid for anything with cash. Oh wait! It was a few Dora dolls I bought from a woman for Hannah. I had to go get cash just to do it.

44. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?

Last December.

45. Can you change the oil on a car?

Nope. Drew does that stuff.

46. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?

I have no idea. That's a good question. (that took me about an hour to come up with...) Oh I know. It was a few years ago I guess? I got an email from him asking for my baklava recipe. I guess he saw a picture of it on facebook? That was so surreal. Random.

47. How far back do you know about your ancestry?

Very very far back on several lines. I love doing ancestry work. Don't get me started.

48. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy?

It's been a long time. I don't even know.

49. Does anything hurt on your body right now?

I have fibromyalgia. That's not a good question. Yes. That's all I have to say.

50. Have you been burned by love?

Sure.

Quick & Easy Tomato Soup

Pre-Puree

2 medium onions, diced
4 cloves of garlic, diced
2 cans diced fire roasted tomatoes
1 can diced tomatoes with basil and olive oil
1 can diced tomatoes with green chiles
2 cups of chicken broth
1 tablespoon dried basil
2 tablespoons olive oil 

Heat the olive oil in a skillet. Add the diced onions. Saute until nearly done. Add the diced garlic. Continue to saute until the garlic and onions are both golden. 

Add the chicken broth, the 4 cans of tomatoes (with juice!) and the dried basil. 

Let simmer until the flavors have melded well. 10-15 minutes. Salt and Pepper to taste. 

Puree it. Immersion Blender, Blender, food processor. Whatever tools you have. Blend it until Smooth. 

Enjoy. 

Creamy Chicken Tomato Spinach Stew

8-10 frozen chicken thighs
2 tbsp Italian Seasoning
1 tbsp dried basil
1-2 tsp granulated garlic
4 tbsp dried minced onion
2 - 14 oz. can of coconut milk, lite
2 - 14 oz. can diced tomatoes and juice
1 - 14 oz. can tomato sauce
2 cups of chicken broth
1 - 6 oz. can of tomato paste
6 cups of fresh spinach, chopped
1 - 1.5 cups of left over spaghetti sauce (optional but I always seem to have some around. Or you could use some from a jarred sauce)
Salt & Pepper to taste

Add everything to the crockpot. Cool on high for 4-6 hours or low for 9ish.

Take the chicken back out, remove the skin if it has skin, shred the chicken and pour it back in.

You can eat this as a soup or our preferred method is a scoop of rice, a little shredded cheese, and a lot of the stew on top of that.

Delicious! Way more delicious than you would think. Next time I think I'm going to add a cup or so of really finely shredded carrots.

Interview with Hannah

Hannah - 2 years 10.5 months old

1. What is something mom always says to you?
"don't get in leah's makeup"

2. What makes mom happy?
"by giving kisses!"

3. What makes mom sad?
"by don't giving kisses"

4. What does your mom do to make you laugh?
"Make silly faces!"

5. What was your mom like as a child?
"When you were a baby you were supposed to have a toy" (She looked so serious I decided not to push that any further)

6. How old is your mom?
"I don't know. Twenty ten? And I'm two. How old ARE YOU?"

7. How tall is your mom?
"You're short down here but I'm shorter down here." (all with hand motions)

8. What is her favorite thing to do?
"Put make up on" (huh? I do that maybe once a week probably less lol)

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?
"Look for me" (haha)

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
"opening candy!" (I am pretty awesome at opening candy....)

11. What is your mom really good at?
"going to bed" (I totally rock that. She's right.)

12. What is your mom not very good at?
"not eating sushi" (Truth.)

13. What does your mom do for a job?
"to take care of us & my tiny bum"

14.What is your mom's favorite food?
 "Shrimp" (It's crab & sushi but shrimp is a high up there.)

15. What makes you proud of your mom?
"putting make up on" (I'm sensing a theme here...)

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
"a woodpecker" (huh. who knew.)

17. What do you and your mom do together?
"watch Diego!"

18. How are you and your mom the same?
"our skin looks the same"

19. How are you and your mom different?
"You have boobies" (nice)

20. How do you know your mom loves you?
"you give me hugs"

21. What does your mom like most about your dad?
"giving him hugs!"

22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
"Sushi Hut!" (She means Tokyo Bowl. I never have figured out why she calls it Sushi Hut!)

My Paper Towel Moment

A few months ago I was getting ready to wipe up a stain. I had that moment where you decide "dish towel or paper towel". A moment mom's have all over the world 100 times a day. It happens in a split second of course but that particular time I actually thought about it.

Self: Why do I ever pick paper towel? Hmm.

Self: I do it to keep the kitchen washrags and towels looking nice.

Self: Wait. Why do I care about that?

I am here to happily report I have not bought paper towels in months. And... my dish towels and rags look like crap. I'm not worrying about stain removal. It's not like they still don't clean everything up. They just don't look as pristine in the drawer.

That's my little contribution to less waste in the world.

And evidence that I have whole conversations with myself. 

Simple Woman

(I want to start blogging again. This seems like an easy
start again. I used to like doing these.)

Find it here.

13 Jan 2013

Outside my window... It's cold. Oh so freaking cold. The first I looked this morning it was -6. I didn't open it to find out the windchill. I didn't want to know.

I am thinking... It's almost nap time for Hannah. Which is wonderful but it seems likely she'll stop hand feeding me candy when she goes - that part is sad.

I am thankful... that it's so warm inside my house!

In the kitchen... It's clean (yay me). Yesterday I made some wheat free, corn free, dairy free bread. It's delicious as it always is. I love Pamela's bread mix! I also made some cookies. Ground almonds, coconut, dried apricots, and fresh apples. Ridiculously good. No flour involved. Double yay.

I am wearing... PJ pants and an inside out t-shirt. The seams were bugging my fibro skin. lol

I am creating... Nothing particular at the moment. Aside from this blog post.

I am going... to make myself something yummy for lunch after this.

I am wondering... about the path some choices set us on. There's no changing some things, eh?

I am reading... A Memory of Light (Book 14 of the Wheel of Time Series), Fablehaven Book 3, Misquoting Jesus (that one is slow going) and I just bought Rough Stone Rolling (a book about Joseph Smith)

I am hoping... that Drew gets to move back home soon! I'm really not a fan of doing all of this on my own.

I am looking forward to... making something yummy in a little bit. lol

I am learning... patience? maybe.

Around the house... things are good. I decided to start doing Motivated Moms again this year and everything is staying caught up - a miracle really.

I am pondering... lots of things. Most of them religious this morning.

A favorite quote for today... “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” -Margaret Mead

One of my favorite things... Sushi. I wish that is what I was having for lunch.

A few plans for the rest of the week... Just getting through it so far!

A peek into my day...

Hannah hanging out in her bathrobe, watching Barbie's Princess and the Pop star while I write this post. She refused to smile though.